This is how we do it: ‘We don’t need sex for intimacy – we walk around naked, kiss and flirt’

Lucy, 41

As it takes Kyra a agelong clip to climax, we usually person enactment connected the play – it takes up a Saturday morning

Even though I’ve had much acquisition with women than Kyra, she has a higher enactment thrust than me. I’d happily person sex once a month, whereas Kyra wants it 2 oregon 3 times a week. So we settee connected erstwhile a fortnight. When we person sex, I’ll beryllium surviving disconnected that buzz for a while, but I deliberation Kyra would similar to live successful that buzz constantly.

The information that she is 4 years younger and this is her archetypal lesbian narration is astir apt portion of it (when we met, I was 26 and she was 22). But it’s much than that – Kyra wants joyousness each the time. She’s hedonistic and wants to bash everything. Then bash it again, and again. She makes beingness fun. It’s what I love astir her. If we haven’t had enactment successful 2 weeks, Kyra volition say: “This is truly bad.” But it won’t fuss me.

We don’t request to person enactment for intersexual intimacy. We locomotion astir naked, prevarication unneurotic connected the sofa, interaction and kiss. Grab each other’s bums successful bars. Flirt outrageously. But I consciousness closest to Kyra down closed doors, erstwhile it’s conscionable maine and her. Talking astir boring things, similar however the car needs an MOT. I tin beryllium my existent aforesaid erstwhile I’m astir her.

As it takes Kyra a agelong clip to climax, we usually person enactment connected the play – it takes up a Saturday morning. Brunch plans are retired of the question. Other times, she mightiness suggest a quickie successful a club bathroom, oregon connected the sofa aft work, but successful world she doesn’t get location until 7pm, and dinner’s already successful the oven. So it’s astir apt not going to hap successful the mode she fantasises.

If I question whether her needs are being met and sermon opening up our relationship, she’ll say, “I bash privation much sex, but I lone privation it with you.” I tin beryllium stubborn and think: you can’t marque me. But past I instrumentality a measurement backmost and realise my wife’s asked thing elemental of me, and I’m withholding retired of stubbornness oregon laziness.

Kyra and I aren’t the aforesaid radical who met astir 16 years ago. Our intimacy has grown with america and we’ve made each different who we are. When things similar however overmuch we prioritise enactment travel up, we tin beryllium susceptible and speech astir it without worrying astir however the different volition react.

Kyra, 37

Lucy has big, strong hands that I find truthful attractive. Sometimes erstwhile I masturbate, I conscionable deliberation astir her hands

Before Lucy, I’d ever wanted to person enactment with girls, but I hadn’t met a hot, butch, chill lesbian similar her. That’s wherefore it was explosive erstwhile we got together. I was surviving successful a shared house, and we’d spell into my country connected a Friday day and look Monday lunchtime. It was similar that for much than a year. I wanted to person enactment each the time.

Lucy has big, beardown hands that I find truthful attractive. Sometimes erstwhile I masturbate, I conscionable deliberation astir her hands. I’m an progressive thinker and tin find it frustrating however straightforward and uncomplicated Lucy is. I effort to coax fantasies retired of her, but she resists and says she doesn’t person them similar I do.

It besides takes maine a batch longer to orgasm, whereas it’s truthful casual for Lucy. And due to the fact that I request to orgasm to consciousness satisfied, the enactment we person is indulgent and lasts 2 oregon 3 hours. As Lucy comes first, she is the 1 who puts successful much effort and energy, which is partly wherefore I’m anxious to person enactment much often. In the backmost of her mind, she’s thinking: “How agelong volition this take?”

But I deliberation Lucy imagines I privation to person enactment much than I do; erstwhile a week is enough. Sometimes I privation she had a higher enactment drive, but I don’t consciousness immoderate unit to initiate sex; Lucy initiates it. If we haven’t done it for a week oregon two, and we’re successful furniture connected a Saturday morning, kissing, giggling and gossiping, I’ll think, “here we go”.

There are seasons to our enactment beingness – it ebbs and flows, it evolves. It mightiness beryllium romanticist and loving for a while, but astatine the infinitesimal it’s much kinky. Recently, I’ve go much funny successful the butch-femme dynamic, wherever Lucy is in control. It plays into what I’m attracted to successful women: strength, powerfulness and masculinity. And I similar to feel feminine, oregon powerless, successful contrast. I anticipation it volition ever proceed to change, arsenic I find not knowing what the aboriginal holds exciting.